Cordless freedom with maximum flexibility.

'' M'Ongoose ! M'Ongoose ! The hoovers broken ! ". Madame Bay advances towards me. In her outstretched hands a hoover wheel and shards of fractured axle.

So it is that an hour later ' M'Ongoose' finds himself in the local electrical supplier accompanied by an enthusiastic seventy something in a padded red and blue striped  housecoat , tartan leggings and  paisley turban. ( The turban is held together at the front by a piece of costume jewellery several times bigger than the Kohinoor diamond ) .

Buying a hoover is not as easy as it sounds. Or to put it more precisely buying a hoover with Madame Bay is not as easy as it sounds. Vacuum cleaners are taken out of boxes, road tested along the aisles, shaken to test their build quality. The merits of pull along versus push along discussed with the sales lady. Several models are rejected because of their colour.

Finally a vacuum cleaner is chosen. '' Are you sure ? " I ask  . Madame has chosen a cordless model with a Lithium battery. ' It's perfect and look - the manufacturer gives you €35 back ' comes the robust response. Cordless freedom with maximum flexibility. Madame Bay a marketing departments target audience.

By the check out counter a display of CD's. Assorted French crooners.  Madame Bay picks up a Johnny Hallyday album . She sings along happily to it , clicking her fingers and swinging her upper body from side to side as we drive the thirty minutes home.