Friday, June 8, 2012

The perfect fondue






The weather forecast in the  local newspaper is positively apocalyptic. The map shows jet black clouds , interspersed with angry red and yellow lightning bolts , positioned directly over our little piece of paradise . " 90 kilometre gusts and heavy rain " it cheerfully predicts. Angus rushes outside and hastily cuts the lawn . The sun then beams down all day. There's cloud but not even a hint of a breeze. Perhaps the storm will come later in the week .

The old medieval pilgrim hostel  in the little market town is being renovated . A year or so ago we'd toyed with the idea of buying it and turning it into a restaurant . Now , the two old sisters who offered to sell it to us at a vastly inflated , central Paris price , have finally given up and sold it to the  municipality for next to nothing . It's being turned into flats for single mothers . The facade plastered a rather fetching rich cream colour.  What , if anything,  goes into the shop on the ground floor remains to be seen . 

At the supermarket Angus buys a dozen macaroons. He also buys a watermelon . '' The first of the season " the sign says. This happy shopper can't help but think that the watermelons look rather small. 

The supermarket car park has been covered in solar panels. A dense forest of steel supports and beams  replacing the graceful plane trees. Workmen are installing neon lights. What's cool and shady in summer is going to be gloomy and dismal in the depths of the winter. A cynic might wonder if the value of the solar power produced in summer is going to be greater than the electricity bill in the winter.

A conference call with New Yorkers in dark suits . It goes on and on . Angus hurriedly arranges for a cab to pick up ' the font ' at Toulouse airport. It seems the large , almost comfortable , Renault Laguna taxi is in for servicing . '' Don't worry M' Ongoose " says the lady despatcher , " we'll send another vehicle. It'll be just as comfortable ".  She sends the ambulance . ' The font ' sits in the front while the suitcase is wedged between the oxygen bottle and the gurney in the back. The ambulance , ' the font ' discovers , is driven by a rather gaunt middle aged lady who by dint of habit accelerates into roundabouts . She also spends an hour imparting the secrets of a successful fondue.

' The font ' has returned with a brush and ink sketch of the Queen done by an Italian artist in the mid '50's. Angus thinks it looks sombre. ' The font ' disagrees .  It goes in a guest bedroom .

Summer in France Profonde.

27 comments:

  1. It seems to me that the artist has given the Queen a slightly haughty look. Do others see this? I wonder if it was deliberate?

    Regarding the perfect fondue, my beloved Swiss godmother Doris and her sister Vera have the right ideas. To quote "Some women in Switzerland act as if they're having a mental breakdown if their fondue fails. But Vera and I, we are independent and intelligent women, and our identity is not bound up with the success of our fondue, so if it curdles, we laugh and order a pizza". When once I was telling a friend about Doris I said she was an excellent role model. "Ah yes", he replied, with a striaght face, "a Swiss roll model". (Not relevant to your blog I know, but worth sharing, I hope).
    Cheers, Gail.

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  2. HM seems to have a rather Italian pout

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  4. The young watermelons look rather surprised by their surroundings

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  5. Were you discussing the economic impact of the mayor's proposed ban on large size sodas with the New Yorkers in dark suits?????

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  6. What a hoot for the font to get driven in an ambulance!! Here, we have "accu-weather" forecasts. The hype they build up about a threatened thunderstorm are, as you say, apocalyptic! Later, after no storm has occurred, the meteorologist pretend to have forgotten their previous forecast. Those dozen macaroons: did you eat them all in one sitting?

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  7. I'd be worried about red and yellow lightning bolts myself! We are currently in the middle of an early morning downpour, I am waiting for it to pass so I can hop on my bike to get to work. I may have to drive. Perhaps, since I work in a hospital, I can dispatch one of our ambulances to come fetch me? What a way to arrive, lights and sirens too?

    Enjoy your day!

    With love from your Canadian pals,
    Dianna along with Tor, Willow and Tucker

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  8. I think the secret to fondue is to get oneself invited to a lovely fondue party and offer to bring the wine. Perfect! I laughed out loud at the thought of the poor Font having to ride shotgun in an ambulance home from the airport. Such an adventure. By the way, I love the ink sketch - very regal.

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  9. Such style! I bet no one else was picked up by ambulance at the airport! Well...at least no one that was healthy and still up-right.

    I like the sketch of the queen is beautiful and there does seem to be a bit of an Italian touch to it.

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  10. I have read about "macaroons" and would love to taste them. I haven't ever found any place in the USA that sells them. They are so colorful.

    I bet "the font" will have fun telling every one about her ride from the airport. Did she know ahead of time what she would be riding home in?

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  11. Hilarious post!

    I could eat a dozen macaroons by myself.

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  12. Only you could combine watermelons, solar panels, an ambulance ride and a weather forecast into one delightful story.
    A friend has always stated he'd like to be a weather forecaster for the media. "The only job where you can be wrong most of the time but rarely fired".

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  13. i laughed all the way through this. not a belly laugh
    but like a fresh bubbling spring that refreshes and doesn't stop.
    it's just a miniature movie, this post is!
    the sad part (all movies have some little sadness...)the metal part.
    the loss of the beautiful plane trees. i can only hope they were
    diseased or something. to just take them out otherwise... a CRIME!
    love and hugs to you two in the deep lovely france profonde,
    tammy j

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  14. accelerates into curves! I know about this one!

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  15. "Uneasy lies the head that wears a crown". I think the artist was trying to capture the complexity of the woman and the role. Lots of emotion there. I like it alot as a change from the typical royal portrait. (She does look a bit "continental", though.)

    An ambulance! As said before, Angus, you simply could not make this stuff up! Even if you wanted to!

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  16. Love the sketch.
    I'm on "the font's" side on this one.

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  17. Oh my gosh, it really is different there. They sent an ambulance? Well, I guess you could call it showing initiative, the ambulance was available, the font was waiting!

    I have always thought that macaroons look better than they taste, such pretty colors.

    I am also in agreement with the font, I don't think it looks sombre, I find it regal and quite lovely in a simplistic way.

    I live in the desert, they get extremely worked up over the slightest little bit of rain here, and it is always forecast as a "storm" and talked about quite a bit on the local news. Very odd to this English woman.

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  18. On the bright side, at least "the font" didn't have to assist in an emergency call on the way home. Love the sketch!

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  19. Absolutely hilarious! An ambulance. Is the font laughing?

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  20. Our weather reports usually show sun, cloud and rain....they try to cover everything...just in case.

    Can't believe the ambulance....

    XXXOOO Daisy, Bella & Roxy

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  21. Did I miss a post? Who are these ominous dark suits? CIA?

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    Replies
    1. allison...
      i don't know if you're totally new or not. but if you go to the sidebar
      and see angus's total profile... it lists his other blogs.
      wilf the pon in france and even before that the first one in italy will
      fill you in, in the most wonderful way. they shouldn't be missed.
      ... are so worth reading! you will fall head over heels in love with two dogs.
      if you think of the financial world at the upper levels ominous...
      ... you will get a feeling for it.
      angus is modest. and i've already butted in too much!!! sorry ongoose!

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  22. Your post gave me a chuckle when I read it yesterday morning, and it did the same today! I wonder what your neighbors thought when they saw an ambulance arrive at your home?

    I hope you have an enjoyable day!

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  23. An hour of being held hostage in an ambulance in Fondue Recipe Chatter!!!! Oh dear, The Font should have invoked the right of Parlay...!!

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  24. More regally distant, I'm thinking...

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  25. Oh my I'm still laughing...Angus you sure have a way with words...I can "see" everything, and feel as if I were right there.
    The Font riding home in an ambulance with a "race car diva" is priceless..
    Macaroons and watermelons I love, but fondue I'm not so fond of...age related weight and all.
    By the way, I liked the Sketch of the Queen, so I'm with the Font on this...hope the guests like it too.
    Love, Virginia

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  26. Oh my I'm still laughing...Angus you sure have a way with words...I can "see" everything, and feel as if I were right there.
    The Font riding home in an ambulance with a "race car diva" is priceless..
    Macaroons and watermelons I love, but fondue I'm not so fond of...age related weight and all.
    By the way, I liked the Sketch of the Queen, so I'm with the Font on this...hope the guests like it too.
    Love, Virginia

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